Many people have an annual checkup with their doctor to evaluate their health. It is a time for people to ask questions and bring up small concerns. The doctor might decide to run some labs or order imaging.
These preventative screenings look for concerns that may need to be addressed before they become a big issue. This knowledge helps patients make informed decisions moving forward.
Just like physical checkups, we can benefit from "Value Checkups" where we pause to evaluate how our lives align with our values. It doesn't have to take a long time. We just need to be honest and intentional.
There is only so much time in a day, energy to be had, and money to draw on. We can't do everything we want or are asked to do. So, we need to prioritize the things that matter to us most, when we can.
Let's explore how to let your values guide your decisions and what that looks like for me.
How to Start
The first step in a "Value Checkup" is becoming clear about your values. If you are not clear about what matters to you, the wishes of others can overwhelm you. These values can become your foundation when making decisions.
- Take some time to name your values - James Clear, author of Atomic Habits, suggests limiting your list to five core values. He states that "if everything is a core value, then nothing is really a priority."
- Be specific. Think about how the value might look in your life. Do this for each value you chose.
Next, look at your current situation. How much time and energy do you spend on things associated with your values? Do your finances align with your values? Or is your time, energy, and money being used on things that are not that important to you? What can you change so that your life reflects your values?
Remind yourself that it is not selfish to guard your resources, including time, energy, and money. If we try to be all things to all people, we will burn out, which won't be good for anyone (including ourselves). It is even important to consider the mental load you carry. Something may seem super simple, but if it is one more thing to remember, you may still benefit from declining.
Sometimes we will have to do things that are not always fun or easy. We may need to compromise and "take one for the team." However, if we are constantly sacrificing what is important to us, it's important to ask why. Getting to the root of that can give you direction to move forward.
Some of My Values
My health is a major value for me because it's foundational to a great quality of life. So, I prioritize eating nutritious food, moving my body, spending time with friends and family, going outside, sleeping well, and reducing stress.
Do you see how many of my resources (time, energy, money) this one value brings? Luckily, this value is connected with many of my other values like connection, nature, and movement. But it can still be hard to balance these values with other things that need to get done. This is where I need to get strategic.
Katy Bowman, author of Movement Matters, talks about stacking your life. This is when you do one task that contributes to several priorities simultaneously. It is different than doing multiple tasks at the same time. It is planning your activities to fit your goals and priorities more effectively. It helps us get the most out of each hour of our day.
Stacking My Life
Stacking my life helps me choose activities in ways that support multiple values at once. This may look like...
1. Dinners
- Values: eating healthy, spending time with my family, reducing stress
- Activity: prepare healthy food together over the weekend
- Result: this allows us time together. We have healthy meals prepared for busy nights, so we don’t grab takeout or go out to eat. It also reduces stress because we do not need to figure out a good dinner at the last minute.
- I will note that having Jared at home (Yes, he is staying home with the girls since May!) has been a game changer for my stress level on this one. He is able to do all of the shopping and is an amazing cook, so I get to come home to healthy, already-made dinners every night!). Thanks babe if you are reading this :)
2. Free time
- Values: movement, spending time with family & friends, getting outside, reducing stress
- Activities: take my girls on walks, rather than going to the gym. Take a walk with friends, rather than going out to eat.
- Results: this allows me to enjoy time outside with people while getting movement and exercise. This reduces my stress, helping me feel energized, happy, and ready for the next day.
- This summer Jared and I even started a Walking Small group with people from our church. We meet at the forest preserve each week and walk for an hour while getting to know each other and spend time in God's beautiful creation! Win Win Win! If you'd like to learn more and come join us, shoot me a message and I'd be happy to share the details!
3. Money
- Values: reduce stress (this also gives us more money to invest in our other priorities.)
- Activities: enjoying free or cheap entertainment, buying used cars, living in a house that doesn't overstretch our budget.
- Results: we have less stress surrounding money and can afford more things that align with our values. It prevents us from needing to work extra hours that would take time away from other priorities. It has also allowed us the flexibility to have Jared home with the kids for this season!
Making Room for Our Values
Saying "yes" to one thing means saying "no" to another. Living by your values will mean giving up some things you used to do. Here are some things we have done to live more aligned with our values...
- We used to spend a lot of time watching shows in the evenings. While we still watch some, we often play with the girls instead. Weeknights are also our backup time for preparing healthy food if the weekend is too busy.
- My husband and I have noticed that it is easy to get sucked into scrolling on our phones. Now we try to put our phones away as much as possible and spend time together.
- We try not to eat out at restaurants. Eating out tends to give us less nutrient-dense food and can be more expensive.
What can you do this week to more intentionally live by your values? Would the idea of "stacking your life" help?
Dr. Jamie, D.C.