Many people feel an after-holiday slump. The busyness of the season may have carried you through, and now the fatigue is catching up with you. So, what are we to do when the excitement is over, and there are still a couple of months of winter left to go?
Research has found that developing a practice of gratitude is beneficial for one's physical, psychological, and social well-being. Since it's free, does not take much time, and can be done in the privacy of your own home, it may be worth trying during these colder months.
Brene Brown studied the connection between joy and gratitude. She believed her research would show that joy led to gratitude; however, the research surprised her. It was the other way around - gratitude actually led to joy.
A gratitude practice is different than having an "attitude of gratitude" or "looking on the bright side of things." For one thing, it is much more intentional than just being optimistic or thankful from time to time.
Let's explore ways to develop a practice of gratitude and see how it impacts your joy this winter.
Developing a Graditude Practice
There are many ways to develop a practice of gratitude; the key is to be intentional and consistent. Having a plan will help you establish the habit of gratitude. Here are some suggestions, but take a moment to think about what would work for you.
- Journal - Start a gratitude journal to write down three things (or more) each day when you wake up or before bed.
- Friends - Invite friends or family to join you in texting each other one thing you are grateful for every day.
- Actions - Think of something you do every day (i.e., getting in the car, taking a lunch break, brushing your teeth). Come up with one thing you are grateful for every time you do it.
- Expression - Write a card or send a text to someone you are grateful for.
- Spiritual - If you are spiritual, prayer or meditation can be times of gratitude.
Developing an Authentic Graditude Practice
To experience the benefits of gratitude, it must be authentic. When we are feeling the winter blues, we may not have much we feel grateful for. But by intentionally looking for things that bring us pleasure, we can authentically cultivate gratitude.
In the midst of an emotionally heavy situation, joy may not seem appropriate. However, it is important to allow yourself moments of joy. Being open to joy does not minimize your pain, and taking a little time to recognize good things can breathe life into your soul during dark days!
This does not mean that we push difficult emotions aside. In fact, denying our difficult emotions can actually harm our mental, emotional, and physical well-being. It is important to allow yourself to lean into these painful emotions and accept them without judgment.
When Dr. Nicole Braton’s father passed away, she decided to “find the joy in the smallest of things.” For 100 days, she intentionally looked for the little things she enjoyed. She found this practice helped her cope during the difficult season. She has encouraged others to join her in "100 Days of Gratitude."
The Little Things
Mindfulness coach Jill Carbone explains, “Life is strung together moment by moment. So often, we race through our days to get to the next big event, holiday, or celebration. Living a fulfilled life requires appreciating all of the moments in between, for that is where happiness truly lies.” So, begin by looking for the gifts in the ordinary - a glass of ice water, your favorite food, a warm bath, hot tea, or a comfortable bed.
It can be something as small as playing a board game with friends, walking to the park, spending time exploring a hobby, reading a book, or remembering the first time you went off the diving board. Thinking about these experiences can bring feelings of gratitude; lean into those feelings for just a moment.
We can also think of people who have invested in us throughout our lives - a special teacher, kind relative, beloved neighbor, or close friend. If that proves difficult, we can take a moment to celebrate our best-loved authors, the musicians who created our favorite song, or other performers that we take delight in watching.
Consider trying one of the suggestions above just for a week. I'd love to hear how it goes and if you noticed any positive results. As always, I am grateful for the chance to walk with you on your journey to health.
Dr. Jamie